Finding Our Forever Read online

  He was so insistent that she let her head fall back and reached for the sides of the table. She had to hold on to something...

  “Cora, you there?”

  Doug. Of course. He would show up at the worst possible moment.

  “The door!” she whispered emphatically, but Elijah wouldn’t let Doug take this away from her. She felt his beard growth on her thighs as he shook his head in refusal.

  Fortunately, the climax she’d been chasing burst upon her soon after, despite the fact that Doug knocked again.

  After Elijah heard her gasp and felt her body jerk, he straightened in satisfaction. He’d given her one hell of a climax. She could tell that had been his goal, but he didn’t seem pleased. “Damn him,” he grumbled, his voice low as he scooped her off the table, set her on her feet and bent to retrieve the belt to her robe.

  “What should we do?” Her mind scrambled to decide how best to explain Elijah’s presence, her disheveled appearance and their delay.

  After a brief hesitation, he took charge. “She’s in the shower,” he called out, turning her toward the bedroom and giving her a little push.

  As she hurried down the hall, he headed for the door.

  “When I got here, she yelled for me to come in,” she heard him say as soon as she was safely behind the closed door of her bedroom. “But I’ve been waiting for fifteen minutes, and she’s not out yet. So you might want to leave those here or come back later. I’m going to come back myself.”

  Doug said something in reply. Cora couldn’t make it out. His voice wasn’t as strident as Elijah’s. Then there was silence, and when she peeked out, they were both gone.

  Smooth move, she texted to Elijah.

  What I did with Doug or before? came his response.

  Although she could tell he was teasing, his words let her know he was still very much fixated on what had occurred—and she couldn’t blame him. She was having a hard time forgetting about it herself, and she was the one who’d at least been satisfied. Pretty proud of yourself, huh?

  That felt good—even to me.

  Lol. I won’t lie. You could win an award with that technique.

  Glad to hear it. Then maybe you’ll see me again tonight.

  She could only imagine how aroused he’d been when he’d had to leave. Being interrupted at that point was never fun. But she wasn’t sure they should continue what they’d started. She’d been thinking of this fling in such a harmless way. She’d presented seeing Elijah to Aiyana in a harmless way. And yet...spending more time with him was beginning to feel dangerous.

  Can’t. Going to LA to see my folks.

  Until that moment, she hadn’t planned on returning home. She was essentially running away. But she knew where she’d spend the night if she didn’t get out of Silver Springs, and she needed to put on the brakes, gain some perspective, rethink what they were doing. The tenderness she felt at any thought of him frightened her. This wasn’t nearly as casual as she’d imagined.

  When will you be back?

  Tomorrow night.

  Call me when you get in.

  Okay, she wrote back. But she didn’t return until it was late—too late to consider seeing him before school started the following morning.

  Chapter Nine

  Eli had never had trouble concentrating. Not since he’d overcome what he’d been through as a child and grown into an adult. He was so focused on his job and the boys he served that there were days when he almost forgot to eat. Work was what he enjoyed, what kept him going and looking forward to each new day. He was especially busy this time of year, when there was so much to do in order to get the semester started off right.

  On top of that, his two youngest brothers were back, and Dallas, the middle brother who’d taken them climbing in Yosemite, was temporarily visiting. The following week, Eli spent most of his evenings with them, which he enjoyed, but he often found his mind drifting when it shouldn’t. He kept remembering what it had been like to make love to Cora, felt such a strong craving to be with her again he couldn’t help watching for her whenever he was on campus. She’d texted him when she left LA last Sunday night but only to let him know she’d be getting back too late to see him. With Dallas in town, Eli hadn’t thought much of it. He’d told her to let him know when she’d be available, which indicated he wanted to see her again, but he hadn’t heard from her in six days. He wasn’t sure what she was thinking. Although she’d smile and wave if she happened to bump into him—she wasn’t unfriendly—she’d turn away right after, wouldn’t really meet his eyes. And she never called him or reached out to him, even at night. Since Dallas was staying at the big house with Aiyana, Liam and Bentley, they could’ve seen each other despite Dallas’s presence on the ranch, if she’d acted interested.

  Eli had almost stopped by her place a dozen times. He would have at least called her, but he could tell that something was different. She’d withdrawn. He wanted to believe she was just busy. Being a new teacher, any teacher, the first week of school was stressful. He needed to give her time to settle in, couldn’t expect to take priority over her work. From what he could tell, she was dedicated to her students and intent on getting to know them. Since he was the one who’d hired her, and he’d chosen her over a candidate most others had expected to get the job, he wanted her to excel. He’d heard from several of the boys that she was already well liked, which gave him hope. But when he saw her at their first football game last night, and she still didn’t reach out to him afterward, like he’d thought she might with the weekend before them, he knew it was more than her job that was keeping her away.

  She’d decided she wouldn’t see him again. Why? What had made her change her mind? Had she decided a strictly physical relationship wasn’t worth it? Had she gotten back with her boyfriend? Or...what?

  “Hey, where are you tonight, man?”

  Eli blinked and drew his attention back to Dallas and Gavin, who’d dragged him to the bar. He didn’t come here often, was careful about how much he drank. Although drinking could wipe out the painful thoughts and memories that plagued him, it could also rob him of his functionality. And he was determined to show the boys he worked with how to overcome that temptation, not fall right into it.

  “Sorry, what’d you say?” he asked Dallas, who’d broken into his thoughts.

  Dallas finished his last swallow of beer. “You’re a million miles away. I was wondering what you were thinking.”

  Eli lifted his own glass. “I’m thinking Freddy Nance deserves to play ahead of Jason Peachtree.”

  “Do you have any idea what the heck he’s talking about?” Dallas looked to Gavin for an explanation.

  “Cougar football,” Gavin replied. “Freddy and Jason are both hoping to make first-string quarterback at New Horizons.”

  “Jason’s so gifted,” Eli said. “But Freddy’s willing to work twice as hard. That counts for more, in my book.”

  Dallas shook his head. “I swear, big brother. You need to get off that campus a little more often. Look at the chicks here, man. Have some fun.”

  Dallas’s childhood hadn’t been any better than Elijah’s. After a relatively normal life, he’d watched his father come unhinged and shoot his mother and his sister, and attempt to shoot him before he managed to run out of the house. When the police came, they found that his father had turned the gun on himself. While Eli used work to anesthetize him from his past, Dallas deadened the painful memories he carried with sex when he wasn’t climbing and adrenaline when he was. Eli was fairly certain, of the three of them, Aiyana worried about him the most. Eli did, too. Although Gavin had been abandoned at six years old in a park, he seemed to cope better with life.

  Or maybe he just pretended to.

  “I try to leave the women alone,” Eli said.

  “Because...”

  “B
ecause I’ll wreck their life. I should come with a warning label.”

  “It’s only sex, man. As long as it’s consensual and doesn’t get too crazy, sex never hurt anybody.”

  “You forget,” Eli said drily. “This is a small town. There’s no way not to run into the same woman over and over.”

  “You can’t do that sort of thing here,” Gavin grumbled in agreement.

  “Then you both need to get off that ranch a little more often. Drive to LA.”

  “If we slept with as many women as you do—” Gavin started, but Dallas cut him off.

  “You’d have some fun for a change.”

  Eli rolled his eyes. “Or wind up with a disease.”

  “Not if you’re careful.”

  “I don’t get the impression you’re as careful as you should be—about anything,” Eli joked, but if Dallas answered, he didn’t hear it. He felt his smile wilt the second he glanced up and saw Cora walk into the bar with Darci Spinoza.

  She didn’t notice him, not at first. But it didn’t take long. Those wide, innocent eyes of hers, busy scanning the tables along the periphery of the dance floor as she looked for a place where they could sit down, stopped the second they encountered him—and recognition dawned.

  To her credit, she and Darci walked over to say hello. Actually, Cora didn’t really have any choice—neither one of them did. He was their boss, after all. It would’ve been rude to ignore him.

  Fortunately, Darci didn’t seem to know anything had ever happened between him and Cora. “Hey.” She grinned at Dallas. “Look who’s in town—trouble!”

  “You know me already,” Dallas responded. “It’s great to see you again. You’re Darci, right? The English teacher?”

  They’d met at the school Christmas party. Aiyana insisted that the entire family get together for the holidays—no matter what they had going.

  “Yes,” Darci replied. “It’s great to see you, too.”

  Dallas slid off his stool and stood, his gaze shifting to Cora. Eli could tell he found her attractive. “I don’t believe I’ve ever seen you before.”

  “I noticed you at the football game last night, down on the field with Eli.”

  “If only I would’ve known you’d be in the stands,” he said.

  Darci introduced Cora, and Cora smiled politely as she shook first with Dallas and then Gavin. “Nice to meet you both.”

  “You must know Eli,” Dallas said.

  “Yes. Eli hired me.”

  “I can see why.” Dallas pulled over a stool and began looking for a second one. “Any chance you’d like to join us?”

  Cora started to decline. She looked as though she couldn’t get away fast enough. But Darci didn’t seem to be paying any attention to her discomfort. She overrode Cora’s response with an eager, “Sure. Why not? We were looking for some entertainment.”

  Gavin pulled over another chair while Dallas gave her a bow. “We’re happy to provide that, aren’t we, boys?”

  Darci took the seat closest to Dallas, which left the stool between Eli and Gavin for Cora. She sat down, but Eli got the impression she was being careful not to touch him, even incidentally.

  Darci and Cora ordered a drink. Then they all talked for an hour—about Dallas’s climbing, the places he’d visited, that he’d be leaving in three days, the fact that Seth, another brother who was a sculptor, had secured a gallery showing in San Francisco, one he’d been working hard to parlay into a second and third showing in Chicago and New York, which was why he hadn’t visited this summer as he’d originally intended.

  Darci brought up her kids and her divorce and how much better she was feeling now that she was getting beyond it, but Cora didn’t say much. She mostly listened—and focused on Dallas or Gavin, anyone but him. When Dallas asked her to dance, she agreed, but Eli had a difficult time watching. He didn’t care to consider the reason.

  Eventually, while they were having a second drink, she mumbled something about having to go to the bathroom and crossed to the far side of the bar, where the restrooms were located. Eli held off for a few seconds, so it wouldn’t appear as if they were going together. Then he followed her and waited in the hallway until she came out.

  She took one look at him and stopped.

  “Have I done something to offend you?” he asked.

  “Of course not.”

  “Then why haven’t I heard from you?”

  “No reason,” she said. “I’ve been...busy. I figured you were, too.”

  He shoved a hand through his hair. He was so confused by her abrupt reversal. “You didn’t get back with your boyfriend when you went to LA last weekend...”

  She shook her head. “Didn’t even see him. I went to my folks’.”

  “So...what is it?” he asked. “Something’s different.”

  “Nothing. Not really. I just... I think you were right.”

  A trickle of foreboding went through him. “About...”

  “You’re my boss. It isn’t wise to get so intimately...involved when we work together.”

  That wasn’t the reason she’d stepped back; he could tell. “So... I screwed up somehow. You don’t want to see me anymore.”

  She rubbed her forehead. “You didn’t screw up.”

  “I must’ve done something, because I thought everything went...well. Better than well. Great.” He lowered his voice in case someone else happened upon them. “Maybe I came too soon that first time and disappointed you, and you have every right to be frustrated that I wouldn’t be more sensitive to your pleasure, but I hadn’t been with anyone in a long time. That isn’t how I usually behave. Trust me. I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again.”

  “I’m not like that, Eli. I wanted you to come—to do whatever you were compelled to do. That first time has nothing to do with it.”

  “Then there’s something else...”

  She said nothing, so he stepped closer.

  “I’d really appreciate it if you’d take two seconds to explain, so I don’t have to keep wondering why everything was fine and then...”

  After tucking her hair behind her ears, she lifted her chin to confront him. “Being with you did go well. Too well. Every night before I go to sleep, you’re all I can think about—the way you touched me, the way you kissed me. Even the way you smell.”

  “So why are you stonewalling me?” he asked, stunned.

  “I’m trying to do us both a favor, okay?”

  He spread out his hands. “By rejecting me?”

  “By adhering to our original agreement! You wanted to keep it strictly physical.”

  “So did you!”

  “Yes, but—”

  “Physical means we touch each other.”

  “Except I feel something! I know it’s crazy. We just met. But you were right in the beginning. I can’t do it,” she said and brushed past him.

  * * *

  Cora wished she could go home. Sitting next to Eli, talking and laughing with his brothers, certainly didn’t make her want him any less. She’d thought her admission in the hallway would scare him away, or at least make her feel so exposed that would douse the flames. But the way he watched her only made her crave his hands on her body more with each passing second. Sexual energy all but crackled through the air between them like electricity.

  How could she become infatuated with someone so quickly? Especially when she’d only ever been lukewarm with her previous partners?

  Her ex-boyfriend would’ve given anything to be able to make her feel even half as much...

  Her response to Eli was a mystery—an ironic mystery. After being so cavalier with him that night when he brought Doug home, she was getting what she deserved, having to eat her words. And, to make it all worse, she couldn’t slip out of the bar to escape th
e tension between her and the man sitting next to her. Forcing Darci to leave when she was having so much fun would be too selfish. After what Darci had been through, this was the kind of thing she needed. A night that was carefree and fun. The chance to talk and laugh and forget the difficulties of the past year. Darci was enjoying every moment and didn’t seem to notice that Cora sat on pins and needles.

  “Dance with me.”

  Dallas had danced with her twice before, but this was Eli. He hadn’t danced with anyone yet, and because he’d asked in front of his brothers, she didn’t feel as if she could refuse him.

  “Go dance!” Darci said before she could respond, and she got up and let him lead her onto the floor.

  Rihanna’s “Stay” was playing as he looped his arms around her back. She tried to resist getting too close but gave up on that the moment his hands slid up her back. He was coaxing her to relax, which made it impossible to resist the temptation to melt into him.

  “Why are you doing this?” she asked as they swayed to the music.

  “Why am I doing what?”

  His breath was warm against her ear. “Tempting fate.”

  “Because it’s too late to back away now. We’re already in this.”

  “It’s not too late.”

  As he brought his head up, his lips brushed her neck. To the casual observer that move probably looked inadvertent, but she understood he’d done it on purpose—and felt a corresponding sizzle zip through her.

  “You think we’re going to be able to fight what we feel for a whole year?” he murmured.

  What else could they do? He was Aiyana’s son! The only reason she’d let herself go as far as she did was because she’d assumed she’d be able to remain somewhat objective. Now that she’d spent some time with him, however, she had to acknowledge that it wasn’t going to be easy come, easy go.